December 8, 2011.... I lost my Dad. We fought hard for 2 long years but the cancer beast won the fight! God was screaming his name and he went home. I am thankful that we were able to get him home on hospice the day that he died. He had been in the hospital for 2 days prior to his passing and my sister and I knew that he wanted more then anything to be at home, with his family when he passed.
So with my sister and I, and many other family members by his side, he passed away at home at 3:28pm.
The days that followed were so very hard... Burying my Dad, was one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do. But I was determined to follow through with all his final wishes, so with my awesome husband and family by my side, I struggled through the funeral and burial of the first man I ever loved, My Daddy!
In his casket we placed photos of his short 58 years here on earth, his favorite baseball cap sporting the Harley Davidson symbol, his badge from when he was a bridge officer with Delaware River Joint Toll Commission and pictures made by the precious little hands of my children, his 3 grandchildren. With everything we placed with him we placed our love and tears. I dressed him in his favorite pair of jeans and cozy long sleeved shirt and his favorite white sneakers! He looked so handsome... I always told him that the cancer never stole his good looks or his hair! That always made him smile!
Christmas was hard... I can't explain the emptiness I have inside me now and I can only pray that time will heal some of my open wounds. I miss him so much and there hasn't been a day since we lost him that I haven't thought about him!
I also pray that 2012 will bring me and my family a better year... No more sickness, no more hospitals and no more pain! I know that my grief will come in waves and I am willing to let the tears flow as they come... I plan to love and cherish my children and husband everyday and thank God for each morning that I get to wake up to their beautiful, smiling faces! And I will always know that I have a loving and wonderful angel that will look over me and my family everyday for the rest of our lives!!
I miss you Daddy.... I have always loved you and I always will!
"Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep,
I am in the thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush
I am in the grateful rush, Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine at night,
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry, I am not there, I do not die!"
"God saw you getting tired and a cure was not to be
So he wrapped his arms around you and whispered
Come with me...
A Golden heart stopped beating
Hardworking hands laid to rest
God broke our hearts to prove to us,
That he only takes the best!"
My Beautiful Family!!!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Friday, September 9, 2011
A Mother's Thankful Heart
I come before you, Father
To Thank You for this life
The Blessings you have given me
As a Mother and a Wife.
I am thankful for my Children
As I watch them grow and Play
Knowing that each moment
Will last for just today.
I'm thankful for the laundry
For the dust I wipe away
I'm thankful for the problems
that make me stop and Pray.
I'm thankful for my husband's job
The roof above our heads
I'm thankful for our daily food
For the comfort of our beds!
I'm thankful for the errands
The phone that always rings
I'm thankful for the tears we cry
For the joy that laughter brings.
I'm thankful for our Family's love
The way we sit and talk
The simple games we often play
The picnics and the walks.
I'm thankful for the little things
That make up everyday
For therein lies your love, Lord
And the wonder of your ways.
I'm thankful for the memories
That life has brought my way
I count it as your blessing
To be a Mother everyday!!
~A Prayer of Gratitude
To Thank You for this life
The Blessings you have given me
As a Mother and a Wife.
I am thankful for my Children
As I watch them grow and Play
Knowing that each moment
Will last for just today.
I'm thankful for the laundry
For the dust I wipe away
I'm thankful for the problems
that make me stop and Pray.
I'm thankful for my husband's job
The roof above our heads
I'm thankful for our daily food
For the comfort of our beds!
I'm thankful for the errands
The phone that always rings
I'm thankful for the tears we cry
For the joy that laughter brings.
I'm thankful for our Family's love
The way we sit and talk
The simple games we often play
The picnics and the walks.
I'm thankful for the little things
That make up everyday
For therein lies your love, Lord
And the wonder of your ways.
I'm thankful for the memories
That life has brought my way
I count it as your blessing
To be a Mother everyday!!
~A Prayer of Gratitude
1st Week of School 2011
Well... Our first official week of school has come to a close with much success! The kids and I had a great time these past couple days getting back in to the swing of things. Broke out some new books and some fresh pencils and everyone was happy!
Lauren has started 5th Grade work and is definitely seeing her work load increase but she is loving all the new information and is taking it like a champ! Kaitlyn has started 2nd Grade and is so excited this year because she can read better and better everyday.. The work is so much more fun and easy when you can read and comprehend it on your own! She wakes up everyday with a smile on her face and ready to get to work! Dylan and I are just having fun together learning all about the ABC's and 123's and how to write his name. We are learning all his shapes, colors and doing lots of coloring and fun dot to dots!
The girls are looking forward to starting their new dance class on Monday night! Lauren will be doing Ballet and Kaitlyn will be doing Jazz this year! We got all their new dance clothes and shoes and they are ready to go!
We have a couple really great field trips planned this month already with our Homeschool group and are really looking forward to them as well. We are visiting our local park for a Pond Study and a Natural Dyes class which the kids seem very excited to learn all about!
Now time to rest and enjoy the weekend as a family!
Lauren has started 5th Grade work and is definitely seeing her work load increase but she is loving all the new information and is taking it like a champ! Kaitlyn has started 2nd Grade and is so excited this year because she can read better and better everyday.. The work is so much more fun and easy when you can read and comprehend it on your own! She wakes up everyday with a smile on her face and ready to get to work! Dylan and I are just having fun together learning all about the ABC's and 123's and how to write his name. We are learning all his shapes, colors and doing lots of coloring and fun dot to dots!
The girls are looking forward to starting their new dance class on Monday night! Lauren will be doing Ballet and Kaitlyn will be doing Jazz this year! We got all their new dance clothes and shoes and they are ready to go!
We have a couple really great field trips planned this month already with our Homeschool group and are really looking forward to them as well. We are visiting our local park for a Pond Study and a Natural Dyes class which the kids seem very excited to learn all about!
Now time to rest and enjoy the weekend as a family!
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Favorite and Inspirational Quote of the Day...
Dylan Caught a Dragon Fly on his finger!! This is Homeschooling..This is Life!
9/3/2011
Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire. -
William Butler Yeats
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Favorite and Inspirational Quote of the day...
" Homeschooled children are receiving what the public schools fail to dish out: an education focused on the student's interests, the student's academic level, and the student's genius or special needs...."
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Homeschooling in the face of crisis... Update
I hope everyone has had a relaxing summer and your days spent with the people you love the most! We are looking forward to another great year of Homeschooling and adventures as a family! Labor Day is quickly approaching this weekend and I am kinda sad to say goodbye to summer..
But, I have some great news.... My Dad is doing much better these days and at his last doctors appt. we were told that his liver tumor has shrunk another 2cm and the tumor under his lung has shrunk as well! We couldn't be more excited!
The past year and half has been an up hill battle for sure.. Good Days and Bad Days..But he is still hear and holding strong!
So as we get ready to go into September and our lives get crazy again with lessons, field trips, homeschool group activities, dance class, AWANA at church and the holidays.. I wish all of you all the happiness that this time of year brings and I hope for a smooth transition from summer into fall! And of course I will continue to write as I can about all of our adventures.. Good or Bad it feels good to let it out!!
But, I have some great news.... My Dad is doing much better these days and at his last doctors appt. we were told that his liver tumor has shrunk another 2cm and the tumor under his lung has shrunk as well! We couldn't be more excited!
The past year and half has been an up hill battle for sure.. Good Days and Bad Days..But he is still hear and holding strong!
So as we get ready to go into September and our lives get crazy again with lessons, field trips, homeschool group activities, dance class, AWANA at church and the holidays.. I wish all of you all the happiness that this time of year brings and I hope for a smooth transition from summer into fall! And of course I will continue to write as I can about all of our adventures.. Good or Bad it feels good to let it out!!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Homeschooling in the face of crisis.. My Dad's story.
When I decided to homeschool I was a naive newbie that had this image in my head of a perfect family and a perfect life.... If I had only known.
It was February 7, 2009... The phone rings... "Hello", I say all chipper, knowing it was my Daddy by the caller ID. But the voice on the other end was not at all like the Daddy's voice that I was used too. He sounded weak and defeated and just not good at all.
"Hi, Honey" is what I heard and next "I am not feeling so good, maybe we should go to the ER?" My heart sank. Here is a man that was always supposed to be tall and strong and right now he sounded so weak and scared. Well, I am scared too! "Ok, Let's go right now!" I said in a hurry.
We got to the hospital and expected to hear that he had stomach ulcers or something like that, that would be causeing his belly pain. What we would hear next would change our lives forever!
"There is a large black spot on your Liver", said the ER doctor to my Dad and I. The room fell silent and we knew what that meant. CANCER!
Over the next couple weeks we tried to stay optimisitc and up beat as we went through motions of getting biopsies and test after test. I continued to keep a positive attitude around my kids and try and keep some sense of "normal" in our home, but inside my heart was shattering. I was going to lose my Dad... At 57 years old, my Dad was going to die! These were the thoughts that haunted me everyday!
In time we got the news that we knew was coming.. It is Cancer and it is really progressed. So whats next.. How do we fight this? In between my ABC's and 123's I am taking Dad to all his appointments and treaments and also trying to be a wife, mother and teacher! Somehow over the next couple of months I managed to keep it all together and keep my sanity intact and keep my Homeschooling going and thriving!
The kids are learning and happy.. I kept telling myself this.. Dad is getting the best care possible and we are surviving, Day by Day!
So here we are alittle over a year later and Dad is still here and receiving the best care I can find, the kids are still happy and learning something new everyday. We are getting our home ready for Dad to move in with us in the fall so that I can take better care of him.
I am nervous for this new life to begin as not only wife, mother and teacher but also Caregiver. I didn't think at 31, I would be caring for a parent yet, but this is what God has chosen for me to do and I plan on doing his will the Best I know how. He has blessed me with so much and I plan on using everything that I have been given to better the lives of not only my children but also my Dad. I don't know why all this is happening to me or my Dad right now, but I know that the Lord would never give me more then I can handle. I find comfort in prayer and the support of my family and friends.
When I look at my Dad I see a man who has always given everything for his family and now it is my turn to do my part and give everything back in return. The love and Care he gave to us as children was an awesome gift and I am grateful that I am willing and able to take care of him in his time of stuggle and pain. I Love you Dad.
So moving on.. I am still Homeschooling, thats the moral of this post!! Even though as a family we are facing diffucult times, I know that we can do anything! We are still having fun and enjoying everyday together and I know we have many more wonderful days to look forward too...
This is not the end..
To be Continued........
It was February 7, 2009... The phone rings... "Hello", I say all chipper, knowing it was my Daddy by the caller ID. But the voice on the other end was not at all like the Daddy's voice that I was used too. He sounded weak and defeated and just not good at all.
"Hi, Honey" is what I heard and next "I am not feeling so good, maybe we should go to the ER?" My heart sank. Here is a man that was always supposed to be tall and strong and right now he sounded so weak and scared. Well, I am scared too! "Ok, Let's go right now!" I said in a hurry.
We got to the hospital and expected to hear that he had stomach ulcers or something like that, that would be causeing his belly pain. What we would hear next would change our lives forever!
"There is a large black spot on your Liver", said the ER doctor to my Dad and I. The room fell silent and we knew what that meant. CANCER!
Over the next couple weeks we tried to stay optimisitc and up beat as we went through motions of getting biopsies and test after test. I continued to keep a positive attitude around my kids and try and keep some sense of "normal" in our home, but inside my heart was shattering. I was going to lose my Dad... At 57 years old, my Dad was going to die! These were the thoughts that haunted me everyday!
In time we got the news that we knew was coming.. It is Cancer and it is really progressed. So whats next.. How do we fight this? In between my ABC's and 123's I am taking Dad to all his appointments and treaments and also trying to be a wife, mother and teacher! Somehow over the next couple of months I managed to keep it all together and keep my sanity intact and keep my Homeschooling going and thriving!
The kids are learning and happy.. I kept telling myself this.. Dad is getting the best care possible and we are surviving, Day by Day!
So here we are alittle over a year later and Dad is still here and receiving the best care I can find, the kids are still happy and learning something new everyday. We are getting our home ready for Dad to move in with us in the fall so that I can take better care of him.
I am nervous for this new life to begin as not only wife, mother and teacher but also Caregiver. I didn't think at 31, I would be caring for a parent yet, but this is what God has chosen for me to do and I plan on doing his will the Best I know how. He has blessed me with so much and I plan on using everything that I have been given to better the lives of not only my children but also my Dad. I don't know why all this is happening to me or my Dad right now, but I know that the Lord would never give me more then I can handle. I find comfort in prayer and the support of my family and friends.
When I look at my Dad I see a man who has always given everything for his family and now it is my turn to do my part and give everything back in return. The love and Care he gave to us as children was an awesome gift and I am grateful that I am willing and able to take care of him in his time of stuggle and pain. I Love you Dad.
So moving on.. I am still Homeschooling, thats the moral of this post!! Even though as a family we are facing diffucult times, I know that we can do anything! We are still having fun and enjoying everyday together and I know we have many more wonderful days to look forward too...
This is not the end..
To be Continued........
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